I'm back from the depths...

for a purely selfish cause. I'm putting on an exhibition and in desperate need of funds.

http://www.crowdfunder.co.uk/investment/and-i-m-telling-everyone-an-illustration-exhibition-183

Every little helps!

a little bird told me...

Now please correct me if ive been living under a giant social regect rock for the past how ever long but ive discovered the simple most amazing thing for people who like music. Ok, so thats a little broad. More specifically new music and finding new bands.

I myself love it, but can sometimes sturggle to find a new band that i can proper get my teeth into. They're not exactly growing on trees. So, the beauty of the internet has once again provided us with said tree in the form of

www.thesixtyone.com

Its lovely. You simply listen to new bands that just appear right there before you as if from no where. and if your not digging it, you just click next and bam, there's another one waiting for you right there. And you get all this little popup boxes for all those factfans out there. So please forgive me if i completely skipped a beat with this one. But i was impressed at least.

aaaaaaaand as proof that it works i found these bad boys.

man, its pains me how ahead of my time i am. *cough*

oh thank god slow club

My word, its been a while. But what a beautiful return it is.

complete and utter wonderment.

please go and visit this, its simply incredible.

http://www.thewildernessdowntown.com/

and because i like to keep with tradition

a single pearl of wisdom

ok so, im a bit weak and pathetic and have had trouble with whole "break up" palaver of the last couple of months (this being my perfectly valid reason for no posts...obviously). but fiiiiinally im starting to come out the other side of it, and so now i feel i am able to impart some wisdow onto the broken hearted out there like i myself still am.

" your gonna feel like shit for a really long time, but then one day you'll wake up and they wont be the first thing you think about"

im no mark twain but it made me feel alot better.

to emphasise my point, here i am with a big ass cheesy grin.

and to go with the whole happy happy shit, heres a happy happy song!

talk about a serious blast from the past.

So I totally got off my arse...

and got my tattoo done!

sincere apologies for my tired, mean looking face. Also, the shine is bepantheme.

I also apologise for such below average blog posts, ive kind of had a few things on my mind. Most of which resulted in my eating habits being drastically disturbed. Not cool!

I wish you a very merry summer one and all!

I need help.

How on earth are you supposed to get over a break up?

Ive tried being desperate and needy,

also over eating.

None have seemed to work, so open to all ideas.

Ok, yes

I'm fully aware i just posted something. Something, that looking back, was mindless and pointless and complete waste of both of mine and your time. This is, in comparison to the overwhelming news i have just received.

Ladies and Gentle Men.

Urban Outfitters have started doing duvet covers and wall paper!

Be still my beating heart!



MINT!

Wednesday evening, just before jamie.

OK, so i'm paddling about in a stupid amount of work. Literally, paddling!

So heres some music! hopefully you wont notice my poor excuse for a post. I have also included a picture of some very tasty food in the hope it balances it all out.

dear world!

STOP SAYING "PACHOOWWWWWW!"

PACHOWWW!!!

Poor Excuse For Absence.

Im more than aware that i havent been here for...a while. and sadly its not because ive been under a pile of work or off having an adventure, but purely the fact that ive been going through a two month writers block. And seeing as i do creative writing this is quite a serious thing. but, i must pull myself out of my self induced mind coma and stop being a fucking wimp! Yes!

Now once upon a time, i didnt have brain daught and was able to think up wonderful things with the my here mind. So, until i manage to come up with something more entertaining than me rambling on about writers block. i have for you, a story.

For better or for worse

Two sticks of dynamite stood proud and brilliant red. They were in a line up of thirteen others, which had been placed along the underside of a small country bridge. A long fuse connected them all, then ran down a near by path where a man stood waiting with a burning match. These two sticks of dynamite in particular had formed a bond over the recent weeks, a strong bond that had begun the day their nitro-glycerine has stabilised and the pair had become explosive.

The concept of love had only ever been considered possible for humans and even then it was debatable. The thought of animals loving one another was humoured even to the extent of marriage. And the love a person has for the extra fifteen minutes in bed has become the most revered of all. It is therefore sad that the love that one stick of dynamite may have for another is always overlooked and most definitely thought ridiculous. Yet here we have two simple objects that, since going through so much together, have managed to find that one thing that everyone seems to be looking for. The little things fell in love. Not as daft as you may think, mind. They were both equals and saw each other as equals, at the same time, they each had their role. In all honesty, it was simply to explode, but they would do it together and yet each in their own way.

As they both waited by the side of the bridge, both perfectly aware of the fate, which lay in store. The man hiding out in the bushes struck the match and lit the fuse. The crackle of the spark began to worm its way down towards the line of dynamite. The two lovers waited patiently, pulsing. The flame hurried towards them, it gained speed as the fuse grew shorter. They both knew what was going to happen, and the tension was too great to stand. The little red sticks were almost shaking with fear, the flames just inches away. The spitting fire was creeping in over the top of their heads until it reached the very tip when it happened - a heat so great, it propelled rocks and stones far away. An expulsion of dust was thrown in the air and shards of granite rained down. There was no sign of brilliant red amongst all the rubble, no trace of where the lovers had once stood so proudly. No remainders of a once great.

While i hide and cringe at the thought of someone reading something ive written. You can listen to this!

aaaah, its good being back!

oh my god...

Last night i like totally god kidnapped!

After my our taxi driver took me hostage until he got his full silly amount of money, I feel that i can now defend myself from any of those things out there, terrorists, politicians, foreigners.

the big question?

In life we face many options and situations where we are required to make a big decision. We have to determine what is going to be the right thing to do and the wrong thing to do. We struggle with some of these and others are far simpler to chose. The simplest of all questions being "To wear stripes or not to wear stripes". The answer is always to wear stripes. Stripes are always the perfect thing to wear. The only circumstance where it wouldn't be appropriate to wear stripes would be if you were try to hide at a spot party. So its always Yes! to stripes. I love Stripes. And here is my homage to stripes!

And as proof that i'm not just spouting hipster dribble. Both my self and people i know wear stripes. Look at the fools who aren't wearing stripes!

And on a different note.

tattoo who? tattoo you!

i love tattoos. i think there really nice to have and to look at. my boyfriend thinks im silly and so refuses to get a while sleeve done, which i think is a dreadful shame. i can understand why people dont wanna get them done because your stuck with them forever and youll be old and wrinkly blah blah blah. but youll be around for 80 years tops and chances are your gonna be exactly the same person at the end as you were at the start.

sadly though out there in the world there is lots of stupid people, unfunny people and americans who dont really think about what there doing and go ahead and get some pretty awful ones. here we have some lovely ones!

if i were you, and you were considering getting a tattoo but were worried about the fact you'd have it forever. just be grateful its not as bad as any of these!

and as ever we have some beautiful music for you little ears!

oh whats this...a post.

now, my absence, though unlikely noticed, has not been due to me having lots of work (though i do) or that ive been doing all those festive things a while back ( though i did) or even the fact that ive now landed a highly paid job as a professional sitter-downer. No, sadly im just rather lazy and have been cradling several hangovers. buts its ok now, because even though my new years resoloution has nothing to do with blogging ( eat less soup and try to look more like a girl) i wish ti try and keep it up a bit. cause its been quite nice.

any way, so i dyed my hair red. At first i hated it. but my hate lessened over the fact that my boyfriend accidentally dyed his ginger alla Newton Falkner. and if theres anything thats gonna make you feel better about your own hair then its some nice long, ginger dreadlocks.

on February 2nd my friend from london is coming to visit me, and the pair of us and all my friends from here are gonna head on over to brizzle to see kissy sell out as part of skins house parties. I feel both like im cheating and excited to go. mainly cause the tickets were free and cause...well its skins. As cool as it was in the past, its now sadly just a bit cheesy. Never the less, i feel power through and bring you a bright array of photos and ancedotes. Safe!

Now ive noticed ive got into the habit of ending post with a song. so why stop now. So here for your listen pleasure i give you ... Biffy Clyro.

Quite the fox.

(quick warning though, you may have to keep to about halfway thoughish because of joe wileys plate face and growl taking up so much of it.)

Festive Cheer...

I feel that this lady's choice of outfit alone has ruined my christmas.



but its ok, because the lady and her song made it.

Merry Christmas folks!

Desole...

What with moving house, finishing uni and christmas i feel The Pankcake Book has somewhat been neglated. And by this i mean ive have been celebrating all these things by drinking.From such things i have learnt much more and so feel some pearls of wisdom will help you, or be amusing. Either way, they cant be a bad thing.

1. Do christmas shopping in June.
2. Say your please's and thankyou's.
3. qualifications mean nothing if your boring.
4. love people.
5. Always stock lemsip

While we both ponder my wise words, here is a tuuuune for your soul. And though ive insisted it before, please give this video your eye.

Hello...

It is now two days till i go home, oooh yes! but sadly i have to write 4000 words of rubbish before i get to go. which is lame. All this work recently has put me in somewhat of a negative mood. Ive been looking at things with more hate than anything else. Here, just so i cant vent, are some things that i hate.

1. When ginger girls die their hair blonde. There was one on the bus today, her head looked like someone had bitten the top off of a cadburys cream egg. Its fairly obvious because you have orange eyebrows.
2. When my boyfriend leaves me sitting on msn. He does this sometimes when he fancies some food or wants to go watch a film. The boys gone for hours, then when he does return i feel all daft for sitting there and waiting for him when i could have been off having all sorts of adventures
3. Cheaper by the dozen. I think this film is a hillary duff shaped poo on steve martins other wise flawless back catalouge. The man is funny, however this film is not and i am unable to sit through even the opening titles.
4. My cough. Its actually starting to worry me now. Im scared it might actually a big deal like some really inconvienent disease or something. Today i went to boots to get some cough medicene finally. apparently there a three different types of cough! Now im worried i brought the wrong one and my cough will never go away.
5. When people tell me what to do. This isnt as bad as it sounds. Im not talking when my tutor wells me to write and essay, thats anoying but i dont mind. I mean when im playing on zelda and im doing really well untill my younger brother sits down next to me and starts telling where to shoot my fucking arrow. Ill shoot it where the fuck i like. Maybe ill shoot it at zavi.
6. Arnold Schwarzeneger. Kindergarten cop. Jingle all the way. Junior. That one where dani divitos his twin. Need i say anymore. Cant beleive they made him a govenor of a space larger than his forehead.
7. Vintage and charity shops. with these its not so much i just hate them, its more of the fact that i cant do it. I have friends who wander out with arms full of stuff that cost them 50p. The best thing ive ever found was a cactus shaped glass. though to be fair, that was pretty cool.
8. When people are late. Now if theres anything i hate, its tardiness. Just think its nice for people to arrive on time. you knew we had to meet at a time, i managed to make it. how come you couldnt. i used to have a friend that turned up two hours late for everything. what was she doing! knitting a jumper! it ruined me.
9. When people dont put and 'S' on the end of pound. " ooh thats a mighty fine dimond encrusted scooter you have there, how much did that set you back" " oh why thank you, cost 150 pound from the shop in town" "im sorry, 150 pound, was it just one massive pound that you paid with, or was it plural". Im from the midlands and this happens alllll the time.
10. This forsaken obsession with twilight. I didnt see the films and i have no desire to. I dont belong to any team for vampires or wolves. All this bloody kristen stewart bashing is a little insane, she didnt exactly do anything besides maybe be quite nice to old Ro-Paz. Im just a bit bored of the whole debarcle

And after all the hate and misery, heres something that i feel will lighten both our moods.

Now i can hopefully finish my essay and go to honky tonk!

Home is where the...

...bus stop is. Today i signed a contract for my house next year at uni so as to avoid living in a cardboard box. Its a lovely little house thats right near the bus stop!! I have to get the bus to uni and currently its a lightyear away from where i live so this quite a big deal. Not to mention its a pretty fucking good house. There will be five of us living there and were gonna have rabbit and i will be called winnips. If you care to know what a winnip is then feel free to look it up.

But i handed over my £350 deposit to farmy looking lady with an alcoholics nose and a french manicure and the deed was done. Im well looking forward to the whole thing. Im going to be able to walk to sainsburys!

Work and present buying seem to be of most importance currently. Boys are ever so heard to buy for, when we were younger i could buy brothers a bionicle and my dad some cadburys or a tie and id be golden. Now i have to shop at topman.

ooh i went out on thursday for a friends birthday to a place called Blue Rooms. It was an awful place. So me and my friend (drunkenly) ran off.

I am so incredibly looking forward to going home its unreal. Its the best.

Tonight i'm going to get some sleep!!!!

He we are young fellows...some soothing for a sore head. Well possibly not soothe as such, just generally entertain.